THE NEW VIEW OF WHAT TWO MEN TOGETHER MEANS

Before I offer my perspective on how the societal assumptions of two men together has changed, I think it best that you know all the factors that affect my perspective. 

I am a gay, Catholic, Baby Boomer. When it comes to human rights and health care, I am definitely on the left side of the political spectrum. On the other hand, when considering the economy, immigration, education, tax reform, crime, etc, I tend to be more in the centre or, for some issues, centre-right, on the political spectrum.

However, when it comes to being "politically correct" or "woke," I lean toward the right more every day. I feel this movement is dictatorial and annihilates freedom of expression. We have many examples of this suppressive thought control in the past.  Who in England would want the return of the stifling ethical thought imposed by the Roundheads from 1649 to 1660; who in Germany would want the Nazi ideology to be foisted upon any society; and who would want the iron fisted doctrines of Stalin Communism to be the guiding light of their lives. 

For most of my life, being a 78-year-old gay man, I was the victim of the most insidious discrimination. I lived with a lot of fears of being attacked; of being fired; of being excommunicated; of being bashed and killed; of losing all my friends and my family; denial of public services; blocked by the medical world from seeing my lifelong partner; my partner and I, losing our ability to have our partner inherit our life possessions; of being hunted by the fervent religious as Satanic. Anyway, it was not a good time to be gay and be alive, even in Canada or the United States. 

Okay, so let me get back to my discussion of how changes in how we assess two men together has changed. In the old days, when homophobia overwhelmed intelligence, if I saw two men together, societal mores dictated that I assumed that they were pals or buddies or even best friends.

If I saw an older man with a young man, I thought that they were probably a father and son, or a grandfather and grandson enjoying some time together.

Two old guys together, laughing and enjoying each other's company, I figured they were old military buddies, old work buddies, old brothers, or something similar.

Now, I feel that as homophobia is being beaten back, but certainly not defeated; my assumptions have to become more "woke."

I have to realize that this might be a beautiful, gay, June December romance!

I now have to say to myself, these could be a married couple just relaxing and having a coffee.

This friendly pair could be a couple who have been together for many decades, or maybe, they have just met and want to find someone to enjoy their twilight years.

Now, when I meet someone who says he is looking for a partner, I must be careful, so that I am not "unwoke."

 When I start the chatting, I have to ask him if he has a girlfriend, a boyfriend, or a partner. I am trying to be totally "politically correct. "

To be truthful, I find this new opening of options to be positive. As a gay man, it was always such a pain to assume that everyone is heterosexual. Now, I can actually ask men, perfectly "woke" questions which will lead to knowledge of whether they are homosexual, heterosexual, or ambisexual. I do not have to worry so much about being rebuked. Well, maybe a little from the totally religious and the totally right politically.